Keep breathing, let's talk about it later

Still working on drawings and paintings for the series Malleus maleficarum.  I wanna place the drawings in black boxes, so that you have to peep inside the boxes to see the drawing. And i paint the silhouettes of the women on large canvasses. White silhouettes on a dark black and red background.

Keep breathing

This drawing is a try out. I've painted all day long on a canvas, working out this idea. One painting finished, and i am happy with it. The silhouette is even more plain white.  Soon i will be posting it.

Let's talk about it later

The silhouette of the try out is from the drawing above. But i have decided that this drawing will not be in the series Malleus maleficarum. Because of the colors (green and blue). The Malleus maleficarum women will only be in white, red and pink. I noticed that these colors emphasize their nudity and therefor there vulnerability.  And that's what i wanna express in these drwings.

read: The memory game * Nicci French

taste: sweet white wine  ~  smell: japanese water incense

hear: Blithe field * illuminating moments  ~  touch: the skin of my paint smutted hands

think: about painting  ~  feel: happy and a bit restless

Ready to go

This morning my work for the upcoming exhibition is collected, they were ready to go. I am really excited, trying not to be intimidated, because many of the participants are well known artists, selling their art all over the world. One of the pieces for this exposition has to be sold for 23.000 euros. Gosh, and then there is my work:  small, intimate and leaving an intense feeling i hope. The good thing about these welknown artists is the fact that there will be visitors who wouldn't come for an exhibition with only my name. Not well known (yet). ;-)
I noticed that art has to be BIG these days, BIG seizes, overwhelming techniques. I also see this on the internet: students from art schools with art that intimidate at first sight. Wow! i think, great art, overwhelming and so very clean and strict. I mean the look of it. Clean worlds, sometimes disturbing because of the perfection. That's what i think. It overwhelms me but then.... there it is, i take a closer look, still admiring the perfection of it all. There it is, in all its glory, intimidating perfection and it doesn't move me. It doesn't reach my heart and soul. Oh yeah. it keeps me thinking also. Should i make larger drawings? Flawless drawings? Drawing larger formats is tempting me, because of the challenge. Not because it looks better in a museum (?), trying to ahhhh and oooooh people. But i am also tempted to draw even smaller drawings, as a reaction. Wouldn't it be great: large paintings, installations, drawings everywhere and then a tiny tiny drawing of me. I would hang it a bit low, so people should go down, to take a better look. That's what i dream of right now......

And ofcourse of selling my drawings for enormous prices, so i can take a visit to my overseas artist friends all over the world. ;-)  I was very very busy, but will visit you all soon. Enjoy the rest of the weekend and i wish you a wonderful week full of dreams and challenges.

Malleus maleficarum * Witch hammer

Yesterday i had the house for myself and i decided to start some new drawings. Which shouldn't been difficult in this quiet time. Nobody needing my attention, phone disconnected.... And we have a soft winter, almost like spring or autumn. It was raining outside, i love the rain, a warm cup of tea, my book and pencils.

I haven't draw or paint for awhile and if that takes too long i start feeling very restless. I wanted to draw on the drawing from the post  ´A new canvas´.  But looking at the drawing i didn´t like it. I felt my heart and soul isn´t in this drawing. Maybe i feel different about it in the future and finish this drawing, but for now i reject it. I took my book Dictionary of subjects and symbols in art by James Hall. Great book i think. I randomly opened it, to see what happens. The book opened at the pages about witches. About the book Malleus maleficarum. Written in 1486 by Jacob Sprengers. He wrote about the wicked influences of women. Weak of flesh, women tried to seduce good men to destroy them. Because of this book, because of this malicious Jacob Sprengers lots of strong, smart women were accused of being a witch and murdered. Ofcourse i had read about this book before, but reading this again gave me inpiration, new ideas and thoughts. Just the other day i also had read about women being ´slaughtered´ on the internet. On television we have a daily prominent talkshow in which guests (most men i must say) talk about the news, politics etc. Most women who were guests in this show are humiliated on the internet.  They were called names, threatened to be raped and even threatened to be killed. For sure men also experience this. But there is a difference. Women are not humiliated because of their opinions, but because of their sexe. All comments are about how they look like, about sexual humiliation (slut!) and sexual threads (rape). If women have strong opinions they have to be punished so it seems. Then there is this Italian woman, Lorella Zanardo, who started a protest against Italian television were women looks like bimbos with little clothes on and doing all kinds of humiliating acts. Check out her internet movie Il corpo delle donne. 
So strange how in former days women weren´t allowed to be sexual creatures, and nowadays it seems like women have to be sexual creatures in a vulgar way. But both it's about one common thing: women are not supposed to think and to talk about their opinions. I have nothing against sex or erotica, i have nothing against naked women. I even don´t have something against nastiness. But i do have something against short-sightedness, presenting women as brainless human beings and i do have something against violence against women.

Back to the beginning, feeling restless, wanting to draw. All this information bubbled in my head. I started to draw. I made 3 new drawings. This is a new series: Malleus maleficarum. For now i show you the first 2 drawings in this series. I hope you love them as much as i do. And more of it will come, because i have lots of ideas about it.

AN EMPTY SPACE

Mixed media on paper

STAINS ON MY SOUL

Mixed media on paper

Reinforcement * What the hell am i doing here?

Oh gosh, i wanna tell you so much but i don't know where to begin. Although i didn't post the last three months of 2011, there were some experiences relating to my art. I was a participant on the artmarket Arnhem. I had mixed feelings about it, but i wanted to do it, to see what will happen. It was my first time and other participants*artists were going to critize my art. To see if i am good enough for the market next year. I don't wanna be presumptuous, but to be honest, in my humble opinion there were only two good, original painters and one ceramist who was good. But still i was pretty nervous.

The day began early and my eldest son kept me company. Because of the huge retrenchement on art (although it doesn't hurt me personally, i don't have any allowance whatsoever) I thought it would be fun to stretch a clothesline with my little drawings hanging on it. Support your local artist, was a sign also hanging on the clothesline. I had some nice linen on the table with my larger drawings, some paintings and greetingcards, businesscards and free commercial greetingcards. Perhaps i was a bit too enthousiastic, because at the end i heard that my table was a bit too full and the clothesline wasn't appreciated for being disorganized. I agree with the table, a bit too much for sure LOL, but i chuckled about the clothesline. Hmmm some artists are taken themselves very, very serious without any humour. Don't get me wrong, i take myself also serious as an artist, very much so, but it's good to laugh about yourself also i think.  There are too many swollen headed people on this planet. People who also can laugh about themselves (like George Clooney in a coffee commercial) have my heart.

To continue the day on the art market: after two hours my son left me to go skateboarding. And now  i tell you a secret. People who know me wouldn't say it, but i am very shy around people i don't know. And there i was standing alone with a table full of my art feeling very vulnerable and lonely. It got worse every hour and i was singing a song in my head like a mantra: what the hell am i doing here? i don't belong here.... (Radiohead) And i was sure my so told pretty smile was now a scary looking grin. I became introvert, couldn't react properly. Also because of the crowd visiting the market. I am aware that my art isn't comfortable, you don't hang it above the couch (easily). The daytrippers who came to look art just to make fun of it, eating French fries with lots of mayonaise, were alienating me. It shouldn't bother me, but it did.

Then there were these two men (fellow artists criticizing?) hands in pocket, not looking at me at all, acting a bit indifferent, whispering and laughing together, not looking at me at all. But one of these men came back some times, studying my large drawing Requiem over and over again, sometimes looking at me and if i looked back he quickly looked away. He took in every detail of the drawing so it seems, mumbling some words i couldn't hear. And me, feeling strange, chanting what the hell i'm doing here in my head, hadn't the courage to ask him what he think of it. Fortunately i also had some good conversations with nice people who were interested in my work. That makes such a day worthwhile.

I didn't sell anything that day ha! But  the free cards did find their way into handbags & pockets. A view days later i heard that i was allowed to be a participant again this year. But only with my drawings not my paintings. (whats wrong with my paintings? Kids loved my fertility godess, it made them laugh and me too. But parents draw them quickly away from all those tits lol)  And without the clothesline. Another ha! Guess what? I'll do it! What can i say. I am a masochist. I am a stranger, a steppenwolf. I am vulnerable.   ~SMILE~

REINFORCEMENT

Mixed media on old paper on cardboard. A4

Lucky charms, i wish lucky charms for all of you

The new year is now going on for a week and a weekend, so time for a new post. What can i say, i'm a slow starter. But when we Taurus people get a liking for it, we're unstopable. LOL. That's what i wanna do this year for sure: go for it! Being more secure about my qualities. So that at the end all my hard work will be paid off.  It has already started. For being secure about my website building qualities, i now have an order to build a website for a shop. I LOVE to build nice websites.

This new year will be a great year for sure. I have a little helper, a lucky charm. A beautiful gift from Martine, so that will help a lot. Martine had won one of my cards and as a surprise she sended me this sweet angel. Her dress is made of pieces of lace, shiny buttons. I scanned her, but on a computer you can't see all the fine details as for real. Unfortunately. Martine, this sweetheart has a nice place in my bedroom, where i can see her just before i go wandering dreamland.....

Being a slow starter in blogland doesn't mean i'm doing nothing. I'm painting and painting and painting.... YEAY! I'm so anxcious to show you my new work, but i can hold it back this time. So you have to wait till the paintintgs are finished. Because i know when receiving comments before it's finished, will make me confused and lost. Not for drawings, but for paintings it does. And it's a struggle, but a wonderful struggle this time, because i've crossed a line, i now can let go and flow, flow with the painting. And i'm full with new paintings, feeling unstopable, that feels awesome. At the moment the paintings are screaming louder for attention than my drawings. And this time i'm more than happy to give the attention it needs.
During all this painting extasy, i still had the time to make a new drawing as well. But a little bit different than usual. Maybe because of painting, i now had the energy to step out of my comfortzone and trying something else. On artschool we had to draw models with pastels. I didn't like pastels, all my work became smudgy somehow haha. But awhile ago i slightly used pastel in a painting and the result amazed me. So this time i have made a drawing in pastels. I'm not sure about this lady yet, but i'm pleased with her because of what she stands for. Something new; scary but exciting.

Keep the fire

Close up 

I often draw immediately on the paper without a sketch and gom. The figure comes to life while drawing. I'm aware of the sometimes strange proportions and poses. That doesn't bother me at all. If i think the figure is strong enough  i won't change anything at all. ;-) In real the colors are deeper and richer.

Everything distant, everything close

Lately i was so very tired, that i even didn't draw. Although that made me very restless, i couldn't find the peace to sit down and create something new. All i could do was take care of my responsibilities, reading, sleeping a lot when possible and daydreaming. But only daydreaming makes me sad and even more restless. My muse hadn't left me, she was knocking at my door but i just ignored her. Strange, because i just needed to let her shine. Yesterday, after a long sleep without any dreams i woke up and sat down at my table. There was the beginning of a drawing i wanted to finish.
I wrote earlier about my holidays in France and the view i had from the camping. Everyday i stood there watching this wonderful view and imagining that there must have been Celtic women on this spot searching the horizon for their beloved ones on sea. (there was an old Celtic settlement nearby this spot) It was fun to fantasize about this. One evening i started to draw such a lady. I hadn't finish it there, so i took this dream home. And now she was laying in front of me, patiently waiting. But i couldn't finish this drawing. Yet. So i turned the page. There were marks on this page from the celtic lady. Pressed through, almost invisible lines. I started working, using these lines. And there appears the sister of the Celtic lady. Darker, much darker. She must be the desires and pain of my lady. Hiding in darknes, waiting for the light to let her shine. As i finished this drawing, i imediately worked on my Celtic lady. Now i also could finish her story.

Everything seems so very, very distant

Everything seems so very, very close

All that i have lost

Sometimes Most of the time i find it hard to explain the meaning of my drawings and paintings. The image develops while creating it. I don't make sketches etc. at first, i start drawing or painting and my thoughts and emotions of that moment lead my hand. Or so it seems. For paintings and the mixed media work i mostly have a topic in my head. Like the 'Blood on the floor' series. But i work very instinctively. Music and poetry are often triggers, i'm very inspired by it.
I felt sad and lonely on vacation and this is what appeared on paper, in the middle of the night, only the sound of the sea and the wind and me drawing.....

Art and meaning

Katherine Treffingers art is beautiful and i find her bright colours and (abstract) landscapes with so many depths very inspiring. As she asked me to answer the question What is the meaning of doing art for you?, a project on her blog, i gladly said yes. It took awhile before i answered this question, but yesterday i send it to her and now you can read my answer on her blog.
It's a great project i think and i'm honoured to take part in this. Tnx Katherine.

Her other blog: Our living dream is also interesting, so bring her a visit.

A taste of life

I hope you all had a wonderfull Easter, like i did. The second Easter day was great; i painted all day long!
I finally finished my Taste of life painting, based upon a drawing of mine that's very dear to me. (A little girl....) I started the painting but it was a big struggle, i couldn't finish it. It wasn't good enough for what i wanted to tell. So it stood there in my room, whispering for attention. But i resisted all those whispers and let it be.

Yesterday i started a new painting. The first steps, the base and i am pleased. Curious what will become of it. But then i had to stop, it was enough for that moment. I felt a bit frustrated for being stuck.

My eyes dwell through the room and there she was, the little girl so old. Silent. I looked at her, afraid to approach her. But she was calm and my restlessness resolved in the air. I took a deep breath and started to paint. And paint. Until this girl could tell all she wants to tell. That makes me so happy. Now she has finished her story and i fell in love with her. I am so content on how she grew. I hope you also like my little girl, so old in her shoes. I haven't a good camera so i have posted the painting twice. One inside the house and one outside in the sun but with shadows (i like the shadows btw) I hope you get a bit an idea of the colors etc. The tree is black with red scratches, the earth is also with lots of scratches so you can see many layers. It's a pity this isn't so clear on the picture. But here is my new painting

A taste of life.

An uneasy one?

I draw and paint to express my feelings. Sometimes also hard, difficult feelings from the past. Or things i notice, what's going on in the world. I do not create to make beautiful images. I create to tell a story. Sometimes the story is beautiful, sometimes harsh or both sweet and dark at the same time. Is that possible? I think so. There's also a form of beauty in dark stories. I can imagine that the images from my 'Is that blood on the floor?' series can cause un uneasy feeling. That's not my goal btw, but i'm aware of it. I will not explain what it's about, i think everybody can make his own story. But it's about women and these women are one way or another strong women, not victims.

Selling my soul? Or these mind pearls are worth every dime.

As i mentioned before i am not a business woman. And that's okay 'cause i don't wanna be one. I think most artists find it difficult to sell their art. How can you ask for your art, representing glimpses of your soul, hard cash, nickle dimes or how it is called in the english language. ;-) But what makes the world keep going? Money. And money is dirty they say, poison for the soul. Perhaps, but it's handy when you have to pay the rent.

I used to give my art away for free or trade it for a good meal or music in the form of an elpee. Yeah, that long ago haha. I was a performer and played in different bands and when we had performances that included also a meal, some drinks and a little bit cash. It was great fun and i could manage, so that was alright. But then i became a mother of 2 darling sons and my love and i had to live a more regular life, we needed a more regular income as well. So we had to find a 'normal' job and we did succeed. That was a career switch for me, that turned out to be great because i could also start a study and now i am an occupational therapist in a nursing home. Becoming ill (a chronical muscle disease) was the reason i had to stop working fulltime. Then my hubby loosed his job and for being 52, no diploma's (he's a musician) it's hard to find a new job. And the rent has to be payed, the kids are growing up. So i am thinking of ways to make some extra cash and what am i good in? Yeah, right! I can draw and paint and although i'm insecure about it sometimes, deep in my heart i think that i am pretty good. Raise your hand if you think so too. ;-)

And here i am again at the point where i started this post with; how can i ask such dirty money for the pearls from my mind? But i can, even better, i dare to. But doubting, isn't it too much? People (friends, family) who like my art very much and wanna buy a drawing. I asked 125,= euro's for a drawing. But that's too much. I know it's a lot of money, but i think it's worth it. Every single drawing is unique. And yeah, i know, i'm not famous, i am not a Picasso either, if i was, you had to pay even more darling. Haha. I'm a bit joking about it, but it's difficult. Why is that, that people find it difficult to pay for original art (from an unknown artist)? Also: why do people call artists who don't wanna sell their work upright, as if artists who do sell don't have any integrity? But perhaps i put this too black & white. There's also grey. But this is what i experienced. There has to be a middle way.....

Then i saw on Ebay an artist (whoms work i love very much! > KEEMO) whois selling his art overthere. He's also selling his original work on auction. And i find that a great idea. This makes your art available for many people and they can define their own price they wanna pay. And it keeps me from worrying if my prices are too high, lol.

Also: i think it's more satisfying to have my art in homes where people can watch it and feel joy about it, than that my art is here safe in a drawer. I love all my work, but a drawer is a drawer. And i would be glad to give all my art away for free, i am not a gold digger, but there is the rent again and kids who want to eat.

To make a long story short: you now can bid on Ebay to make an original MOMO LUNA S!gnals drawing yours; Le samoerai.
It's there for 10 days and the last bidder can call him/herself the owner of this drawing. In the future there will be more drawings for auction. I also will auction some drawings on the dutch Ebay where you can bid in euros.

What do you think? Am i loosing my integrity now for you? Do you think i am selling my soul? I am kidding, but not entirely. I really am interested in your opinion.

WANNA TRADE?
Then there is the old trading way i also find nice. Do you wanna trade your cow for 1000 of my apples? I have some trading items for you. Old postcards that i edited into a real Momo Luna item. More of these items also in the future. I upload an item and if you wanna trade it with something of your art, poem or other little pearls let me know in a comment. The first one who comment and offer a fair trade is the one i trade with. So here are three trade items, please let me know if you wanna trade. These are old postcards i edited:

WILD LADY (finds her new home at Ria's, just great!)

THE TORCH
(is on his way to William, that makes me happy.)

BLUE
(I'm very pleased to exchange this blue lady with a pearl from Yvette. )

Tell me what you think, it interests me.

Struggle (what's new? ;-))

Today i was very, very restless. And frustrated. My muse was roaring inside of me, she wants to be free. I have kept her too long in her cage, waiting. I tried different keys to open the cage, but i couldn't manage. Some keys were lost, others rusted or broken. In the beginning my muse was quiet, she understood and was hoping for better times. I played with her creating drawings and she was pleased with the pretty and sweet places where she could wander. If you take a good look you also can find the dark corners where she sometimes wanna hide and feel safe. But she still felt caged. And that made me sad, today i cried a view times, just like that, without a clear reason. My muse grabbed me by the hand, delegating the restlesness and tension. The tension grew and almost became unbearable. So i took a canvas and my brushes and started to paint. Very cautious in the beginning. But she was whispering, and the whispers became stronger, transformed in a clear voice: "Stop the crap, let go! Let go! Don't be a tart, i don't wanna be pretty and sweet. Not this time! I wanna be rough and alive." She was guiding me to happiness and i could let go, feeling more and more secure and i used bigger brushes to avoid unnessesary details. I couldn't stop painting and she broke loose, free at last. And i was in love again with her, feeling so happy. And now she's looking at me from the canvas, so strong, but i begin to doubt again. I think every painter know this progress. I still am in love but i see her flaws. At this point i have to take some distance and let her grow. But i'll complete her world this week, because i cannot walk away from her. Not any longer. It will be a struggle, but it's worth every tear and drop of blood.

The painting is not yet finished and the quality of the photograph lousy, the colours are deeper and more intense for real, but i couldn't wait to share this process with you. In a few days, when finished i will upload a good photograph.

TASTE

Black birds * The movie ;-)

I just discovered a video editing program and it's such fun. Because it's difficult to see all the details on my large drawings i upload, i thought it would be fun to film all the details of the drawing. But the quality isn't that good, some bits are over-exposed. And i find out that i dón't have to film one big shot, but can do tiny parts and put that together haha. But still, i love this first try out and i hope i can transmit to you the atmosphere i had in mind. I promiss you: the next round i make a little movie it will be of a better quality.

I also did the soundscape (music). A soundscape is just like a collage but in stead of cutting and glueing images i do it with sounds and music. Sounds of the television or radio and i used the 9th symphony from Beethoven for the underlaying basic looping sound. I hope you enjoy it! Don't forget to stop my How do u dream jukebox. ;-)

Black birds; i don't need no pain * i cannot get no sleep * is it all as it seems? Don't you see? I've got a sun in me * Monsters don't have hearts ♥ Sure they have ♥ It's the blaze across my nightgown * Insomnia! It's in my head! Let me unfold your thoughts * You are the blood flowing from my fingers * You are ♥

Dream about hope......

Every angel, demon, human, animal or flower i draw

Some years ago, as i was selling my drawings on an artmarket, there was this man who shyly said to me: "Perhaps i'm silly and i sure don't understand art, i'm just a greengrocer, but i like your work and it seems to me that all of your work is a selfportrait." I smiled at him and said that he hit the nail on the head because he was right. I think that every angel, demon, human, animal or flower i draw or paint also is a selfportrait. But isn't that the case with all art and their artists? You always put something from yourself in it. I gave the greengrocer a drawing for free, i'm not a good businesswoman. ;-)

In the drawing 'Black birds' where a woman is placed in the center of it, that's for sure a selfportrait. But all the other creatures on it as well, they are the sorrow, pain, hope and/or love i've felt and feel so deeply in my life. And now some drawings and photographs for you to compare.

Ha! Don't be afraid. The photograph was taken some years ago on a weird party where you had to dress up. Later on i used this image as the center of my black birds drawing.

This photograph was taken two weeks ago by my eldest son. I always think that i'm not photogenic, but this one i like, 'cause i look relaxed and happy. As you can see, my right eye is smaller than the left one. This has to do with the muscle disease i have since three years and when tired or after a lot of exertion my muscles (some) weaken and the right eye is a visible aspect of this. I call it my pathetic or sad eye. I often draw humans or gods with eyes in different sizes, i really don't know why, it has nothing to do with my disease. I did that already before the disease. I think it's fun to see the simularity between photo and drawings.

Dream with one eye open and one eye closed. ;-)

I pushed an empty babycarriage all over the city

This is a very old drawing, i think i drawed this around 1985. I don't know exactly why, but this quick drawing (a set up for a painting) is very dear to me. I didn't forget this one, but hadn't seen it for years. It was always in my heart. It did perish a bit but I like it even better with the damages and thinking about to put it this way behind glass. Is that strange? I haven't made a painting of it, perhaps this year, but on the other hand, i think it's good how it is now. The title: i pushed...... is from an Yoko Ono song.

Searching.....

The lovely Manon Doyle has a beautiful new year wish for her readers; reconnect with yourself.

At this time my love and i are going thru some hard times with tears and sorrow, but that's okay, this also means growth. As a new year begins i always have this urge to clean, as i feel sad i have this urge too. So can you imagine me now? Can you imagine how clean my house is at the moment? And i am a sloven. While i was cleaning up my working space i find a long forgotten drawing map with long forgotten drawings and paintings, even from artschool. I thought i go thru it to see it all and then throw it away. But i couldn't throw it away, because although all these paintings are not that good, they are filled with lots of memories. And one feeling hit me by surprise: during the thirty years of my journey i have lost myself somewhere. How did that happen? Although the paintings were not so good (sometimes) there is a sparkle in all of them. A sparkle of creativity and life. Luckily i have still that sparkle in my drawings, but in my paintings i have to rediscover it. All your nice comments made me strong enough to paint again (thank you!), but i was unsecure, restless, discontented. I have to find the sparkle, to reconnect with myself. This progress started yesterday and i hope the flame will blaze up and burn. Even stronger and brighter.

I'm afraid this month i will upload my old art. But then you can notice how my art journey started. ;-) Again, thank you for your comments, those also make me grow and i hope to do the same for you in return. And now i show you an old linocut. It's a selfportrait.

Conscious & unconscious

De granaatappel * The pomegranate

At the moment i am very restless and all i want to do is paint, paint paint! My most favourite time to paint isat night, 'cause then all is quiet, no disturbances. Just me, my painting and some music. But to paint at night isn't possible when you have children ánd work. So i have to find my way during the day. Also i am struggling to find myself again in my paintings. Insecurity blocks sometimes my creative energy. This insecurity i never feel about my drawings. I have to find my goals again, to find my way to express myself with paint and being happy with it. Sometimes i still find myself too neat, as i pointed out before. But i will get there where i wanna be. In time....

This painting i started to paint some years ago, but never had the time and the courage to finish it. But now i've started painting again and can't be stopped so to speak ;-), i finally hope to finish this painting in some days. Sorry for the bad reproduction, i'll ask a good friend of mine to make better pictures in the future. But i wanted to upload this already haha.
It's a large painting; heigth 110 cm and width 130 cm. There's much too see on this painting. I call it the pomegranate. Because of the many symbolic meanings it contains. In a nutshell: The Christian symbolic of the pomegranate is resurrection. In ancient times it stands for fertility. And in the old Greek myths it's all about Persephone and the underworld. I like this one the most by the way. But i mixed all those symbolic meanings together to create my own mythological language. It speaks about good or bad, guilt and innocence, love, hope, fears, blood. All my favourite topics. If you take a good look at my painting you will find many references.

So here are some details of the painting:
Click on the images for a larger view.

Struggle

I never stopped drawing when my kids were little, but i couldn't paint for a long time. Just because i was too busy and to paint needs time and concentration. I used to paint very large paintings, but some time ago when i started to paint again i began with small seizes. One step at a time. I showed you the beginning of a painting after one of my favourite drawings, but i can't finish it for some reason. Too scared to destroy it? 'Cause i know that i can go on too long on a painting, to make it more beautiful. But then i hate it 'cause i don't want it to be too beautiful. I don't wanna make neat images, i want it to be more than that. I want to draw the viewer into my world and to let him/her feel it. Not the nice things, but the intensity. The struggles in life. The passion and dreams too. I don't like too neat.

So this is also the struggles of a painter, i think every artist knows what i'm talking about. And when i got too much frustrated i sometimes think that i am not a painter at all, that i am a drawer. Nothing wrong with it anyway. But today i finished a painting and i am satisfied with it! I am so happy! I painted a landscape some time ago and i want it to be in a series of emotional landscapes. So i want to paint a figure in the landscape that express an emotion. But i didn't know exactly how or what. So i let it rest. Today i got inspired and started painting all afternoon. And finished The storm.



Landscape before...


The Storm

News

Hi there readers. At the moment i am very busy to start a webshop where you can buy postcards of my drawings. And in the near future my unique drawings and paintings as well. I'm also working on a project to make a book with my 'blood on the floor' images and poems. If that's finished and ready you can buy this book also in my webshop.

I want to write here on this blog about my art and/or poems, thoughts about life etc.... I hope you readers are patient because it will take awhile. But soon enough i want to do more on this blog than posting my art. I hope there is some interest in my activities on this space on the www. ;-)

Sweet greetz,

Topic: Is that blood on the floor?

Why 'Is that blood on the floor?' Blood is the symbol for life and in christian symbolism it also stands for salvation of mankind thru shedding the blood of Christ. The colour red has many meanings: warmth, love and passion, martyrdom. In the dark ages red was the colour of sin and destroying violence.

Ever since puberty women are conversant with blood. The deeper level in this work also contains the pain women often suffer from violence: physically as well mentally. But i didn't paint the women as sad martyrs though. They send out meeknes thru their vulnerability, but not in a passive way i think. I wanted to imagine strong women who despite their pain carry on their path of life with their head high.

I'm thinking about the form of this topic. Shall i print them, large sized? Or like photographs in a small book which i also work up so that the viewer get the feeling of a voyeur.

I've decided it will be a book with images and poems. I am working on a webshop so soon you can buy yourself some real Momo Luna art.