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The mysterious world of MONICA CROESE

7.1.10

Searching.....

The lovely Manon Doyle has a beautiful new year wish for her readers; reconnect with yourself.

At this time my love and i are going thru some hard times with tears and sorrow, but that's okay, this also means growth. As a new year begins i always have this urge to clean, as i feel sad i have this urge too. So can you imagine me now? Can you imagine how clean my house is at the moment? And i am a sloven. While i was cleaning up my working space i find a long forgotten drawing map with long forgotten drawings and paintings, even from artschool. I thought i go thru it to see it all and then throw it away. But i couldn't throw it away, because although all these paintings are not that good, they are filled with lots of memories. And one feeling hit me by surprise: during the thirty years of my journey i have lost myself somewhere. How did that happen? Although the paintings were not so good (sometimes) there is a sparkle in all of them. A sparkle of creativity and life. Luckily i have still that sparkle in my drawings, but in my paintings i have to rediscover it. All your nice comments made me strong enough to paint again (thank you!), but i was unsecure, restless, discontented. I have to find the sparkle, to reconnect with myself. This progress started yesterday and i hope the flame will blaze up and burn. Even stronger and brighter.

I'm afraid this month i will upload my old art. But then you can notice how my art journey started. ;-) Again, thank you for your comments, those also make me grow and i hope to do the same for you in return. And now i show you an old linocut. It's a selfportrait.

Conscious & unconscious

13 comments:

Inkpunk Artworks said...

Wising you lots of inspiration and peace!

kathrin said...

absolut klasse, gefällt mir !!! herzlich Kathrin

Caio Fernandes said...

i
got !! I GOT !!!!
I've sent you an email saying that my computers is a crap ... that a can't open your pop up ....
but i never give up BABY !!
here i am !!
well i told you alread by email what i think about it all .
this post , everything on it , is beautiful . manon is fantastic , you did well discovering older works and this one posted is incredible !!
see you Luna !!

Manon Doyle said...

Hey Monica,

I think we all have to somehow reconnect with ourselves at different points in our life. It definitely is part of our journey. I look forward to seeing how your journey started. Btw.... your art has so much sparkle in it.... it always blows me away!!

Manon

p.s.... so kind of you to mention me!!

whitney-anne said...

It's always interesting to back and look at old work. I have kept very little but I have photos. It does rawaken something doesn't it?

Renee said...

You make us all grow dear friend.

Your art then was amazing and it is amazing now.

We all lose ourselves somewhere but we find ourselfs too. Don't give up hope. Like you said it is a sad time of year and many people feel like this dear one, you are not alone.

Give your husband a good kiss tonight, practice just like you do in your art.

I love you.

Renee xoxo

aleph said...

Hi Momo Luna! I read your post and immediately remembered myself some months ago, exploring old drawings I had kept for more than 15 years. I used to draw faces, all my characters had clear features, nowadays it´s impossible for me to draw a face. I shocked me a lot. And had the same feeling you describe: that of having lost myself, but no clear idea of when, and just a vague notion of why... It´s good to try to connect again with those initial sparkles, take those threads again, it´s a necessary challenge, I think. We are there and we are here.

Elisabeth said...

The old is the background for the new. Value it. There are gems in there that shine, including this self portrait.

Rachel said...

Dear Monica good
My dear Internet friend

believe me, everything good is beisammen never. There are stagnationen in the live, thinks it goes on, and then it comes as a Flash. Back in the middle is a new creative phase.
And that new ideas are born. I think it will come to you because you will can never let up, never hang the wings...

Good luck and strength and courage wishes Rachel very loving to thee,

APOLLINAIRE'S TATTOO said...

let this journey take you into
fare winds and calm sea's momo luna.
love robert.

Momo Luna said...

Thank you Inkpunk, i wish the same for you and more!

Tnx Kathrin, always nice to read your comments.

I am glad you don't give up dear Caio, but an email from you is also nice. :-)

Manon, your sweet comment makes me smile. And yes without tears and some struggles now and then we wouldn't have known what happiness is. And i'm happy you like my art, because your art always amazes me and brings me much joy and inspiration. That's one of the reasons why i mention you.

I wanted to make photographs also Whitney Anne and threw the old stuff away, but i couldn't. Yes it does awaken a lot.

Dear renee, that's so sweet of you to say. And you're right, when losing yourself, you always find yourself back; perhaps stronger and always new. I don't give up hope because i always see things in a positive way. Or at least i try to.
I must admit when i read your comment a tear was in my eyes. Wondering how it's possible that a woman on the other side of the world cares and writes that she loves me. While you yourself had lots of things to deal with but still care about other people. Reading those words you wrote warmed my heart. You truly are an angel i think and i love you too Renee.
xoxo

Thank you Aleph for your sincere and wise comment. It's true we are there and we are here. And maybe i haven't loose myself, but had forgotten about the roots, the beginning. Sooner or later it will pop up again apperently.
Thank you....

Thank you Elisabeth for writing this, i hadn't thought about it that way, but i like it, you're right.

Thank you dear Rachel, no, i'll never hang the wings, sometimes i fold them, waiting for the next time to fly. Being an internet friend like you are is also an encouragement and a beautiful gift.
xoxo

Thank you Robert, always a pleasure to read your comments.
Love, Monica

To everybody: i'm pleasantly surprised and amazed, because of your sweet, wise and caring comments. That's why blogging is interesting and brings joy. Because of you, all these beautiful people!
HUGE SMILE <3

kenflett said...

Hi Momo, so good that you share your journey with all., l love the rawness of these two older paintings, maybe that is what your looking for, to find again, your rawness.
take care
ken

Momo Luna said...

You're absolutely right Ken, i wrote also earlier in a post that i want the rawness again in my work and let go the pleaser that blocks me. ;-) Sometimes i want to do more than my best and that isn't always a good thing.
Sweet greetz for you and your lovely family.