The mysterious world of MONICA CROESE


Encouragement * Gluttonous desires

Her untamable soul
guided her to dark trails.
She was amazed about
her gluttonous desires.
But dreams can fail.
She'll play no longer
hide and seek.
The dreamer
brutally awakened.
And how she learned
that bleeding
accomplish growth.
That pain
allows her
to be her deepest self.


What's behind closed doors.

Pencil, ink & watercolor 10 x 14 cm

About nuns and angels

When i was in my puberty, romantic soul as i was, i dreamed about being a nun. I suppose this grain of seed was planted in my imagination during my childhood. An aunt of mine was a nun, living in a monastery. Once in awhile we visited her, and me and my two sisters wandered thru the old garden while the adults were drinking coffee and talking. This garden was so mysterious. Lots of hidden places where little statues of saints and angels silently dreamed about the heavens. We always were a bit afraid 'cause the nuns who also walked thru the garden were silent and strict. They had on black veils with huge white caps under it, so it was dificult to see their faces, except when you're standing right in front of them. We didn't dare to, we only dared to look at our aunt who was very sweet and somewhat naive.
The big garden was surrounded by an old wall. There was a gardenhouse where the nuns were drinking their tea and far in the back their was a cemetery. The last restplace for all the nuns who lived there. Ofcourse we find that very interesting but spooky. Sometimes we dared to wander till the cemetery and then we thought we could hear the angels singing. After 25 years my aunt decided to leave the monastery. In the late sixties that wasn't that easy. But she managed. When i was about 16 years old and we often visited our somewhat unwordly aunt i find out that the monastery wasn't that peaceful and serene place i thought it was. Struggles for power, gossip etc......

But even today i have a weak spot for the images of nuns and the almost forgotten world they used to live in. So during holidays i wanted to visit the abbey of Montivilliers. Gladly i could convince my three men that it was interesting 'cause they don't share my fascination haha. And then i read a folder about the holy Theresa and her story stuck in my mind. So in the evening when all was quiet, only the sound of the sea, i had to draw her. My image of the holy Theresa.

Ink & watercolor 10 x 14 cm

For now i leave you with an angelkiss. ;-)
Sweet greetz and take care!


More holiday pictures from my heart

My two sons in skateparc Le Havre

My youngest son on a bunker

Setting sun. View in front of our tent in St. Etienne au mont.


The girl is back!

Hi there dear readers. I'm back for a week or so but hadn't the drift to log in on my computer at once. My vacation was delicious: lots of sunshine and much to see. Because of that i hadn't that much time i thought i had for drawing. The coast of Normandy is so beautiful with it's chalk-cliffs. And the sea has such an amazing color, so different. I've never seen that color before. A light shiny jade green, and the shallow parts is whitish like watery milk. That looks so wonderful.
I tried to catch it on a photograph with my cellphone but it doesn't look like the real thing. Now i know for sure i buy myself a good camera haha.

And i made a drawing of the sea with this special colors.

Ecoute! Can you hear the sea?
Ink and watercolours on paper; 9 x 10 cm

We also visited the beautiful old roman city Boulogne sur mer with such a wonderful cathedral.

Late in the evening as my three men were asleep i finished the day with drawing by gaslight, listening to the French radio. And one evening i felt a bit alienated and a suddenly homesickness came over me.

Ink and watercolour on paper; 14 x 9 cm.

I started working again this week, next week my two sons are going to school again and then we are back in our old daily rhytm. That's also fine and i'm looking forward to my favourite season: autumn.
I wish you all a great weekend! Sweet greetz and take care......